It takes two to build a happy and lasting relationship. Many women are aware of this fact, but they don’t always know what to look for in Mr. Right.
Your checklist might include a minimum income, height, intelligence, or appearance. Maybe he should have a good sense of humor and like dogs.
While being attracted to your partner and having things in common is important, you should pay more attention to what truly makes a relationship work. Ultimately, the way you relate to each other is more important than just his qualities.
Between 40–50% of married couples in the United States end up divorced. The COVID-19 pandemic appears to be increasing the rate of divorce, demonstrating how important it is to make a good decision when it comes to marriage.
Women have been fed the fantasy of a happy marriage their entire life and most of them are in a hurry to find a relationship and settle down. But, the choice you make is incredibly important to the success of your marriage, which determines the stability of your future.
Here are the most important steps to take to make a good decision in marriage:
1- Know Yourself
Relationships require negotiation. No matter how much of a perfect match you might be, you and your partner will never want exactly the same things. And, that’s a good thing. But, if you don’t know what you like and what you want, you may end up making choices that you may regret later.
So, ask yourself these questions:
Do you know yourself well? Do you know your strengths and weaknesses? What are your non-negotiables in a relationship? What are you willing to change in yourself for the right relationship?
Unless you’re very clear about what’s important to you and you don’t know how and when to stand up for yourself, your relationship can go off course. Knowing yourself is especially crucial when you’re first getting to know a man. It can help you to figure out whether he’s really into you and how good of a match you really are. For example, if you’re more focused on pleasing him, you might miss the cues that tell you whether he’ll be any good at pleasing you. Learning how to be your own Brand of Sexy will help you to know yourself better.
2- Chemistry Is Not Enough. The Quality of Your Relationship Matters Too.
The most sizzling chemistry isn’t necessarily an indicator of a happy and lasting relationship. You will live with your partner through good and bad times and the success of your relationship will depend on your ability to solve problems when they arise.
Are you able to communicate when it’s important? Will he defer to you at times? Will you defer to him at times? Do you have similar communication styles or does one of you want to talk about your problems while the other wants to avoid them? Women are more satisfied in their relationships when their partners make an effort to understand their negative feelings, even if the men aren’t accurate in their understanding.
3- Have the Important Conversations
Research the leading causes of divorce and you’ll get a number of different opinions. A recent study in Denmark showed that the most frequent reasons given for divorce were lack of love and intimacy, problems communicating, lack of sympathy, respect and trust, and growing apart. When you ask certified divorce financial analysts, they tell you that the main cause is incompatibility, followed by infidelity and money issues. Sure, things are rarely that simple and there are multiple nuances to these factors. But, the bottom line remains that it’s essential to talk about the important things that might influence your relationship. It’s the best way to know whether you’re making a good choice.
Do you want children? Where do you want to live? Are you OK with your partner having debt? Ideally, these important conversations don’t stop once you marry; they help you to negotiate the issues that are bound to arise throughout your relationship.
A Happy Marriage Takes Work and Lots of It
Remember, a good relationship isn’t about looking for perfection. People aren’t perfect and neither is the relationship they choose. But, those who are in happy relationships have one thing in common: they work hard to make it work. It takes knowing yourself, being able to communicate, and not being afraid to stand up for what you believe in to build a lasting marriage.
What do you need to work on in yourself or your relationship in order to have a happy marriage? Leave us a comment below.