When you first dive into the tumultuous waters of a budding potential relationship, your emotions can be confusing; you may start to feel attached and attracted to a new man almost immediately, but it’s too early to know in those fledgling days whether the relationship has the legs to go the distance. Could these feelings merely be infatuation, or perhaps lust? Or is this true love?
There are some telltale signs to help you distinguish between these different emotions. If you’re infatuated with a man, you likely can’t get enough of him — you may feel that you have a ravenous hunger for his presence that can’t be satiated. While this feeling could develop into true love, it may never become anything more than infatuation — only time will tell.
Lust is a purely carnal connection based on physical attraction. Do you love to look at him, feel a giddy sort of flame when you think about the prospect of a hook up, but go totally blank when you try to pinpoint any emotional or intellectual connection the two of you share? If so, then you’re likely experiencing lust.
True love is an entirely different ballgame; it’s a fundamental shift in your life that occurs due to finding your soul mate. This isn’t a fleeting sensation, but rather a deeply-embedded feeling that lasts forever. Don’t be surprised if you can’t identify true love straight away, or if it takes a while to develop; after all, it takes time to genuinely get to know someone. How can you know for sure if you are actually a good match without allowing the relationship proper room to grow?
The Signs of True Love
It’s possible you’ve never experienced true love before, even if you’ve been in a long-term, committed relationship in the past — and that’s okay. Life is full of personal evolutions; consider this a beautiful opportunity for you to learn about what you’re looking for, so you’ll know how to spot the signs of true love when you find it.
1. You’re sure of your relationship. When you have true love, you know that your relationship is secure, so you won’t agonize over every little bump in the road. Arguments are bound to pop up here and there, but they won’t destroy your love.
2. You see the future with him. If you picture your life in 5, 10, or 20 years, do you see your man by your side? When you are truly in love, your partner is an essential part of your life; you discuss your plans together with singular resolution.
3. He inspires you to be a better person. As cliche as it may sound, true love encourages us to become the best versions of ourselves — not because our partner wants us to change, but because we want to be the most supportive, uplifting, and caring allies possible. For example, maybe your man is on a diet and you choose to embark on the journey along with him out of solidarity.
4. You compromise for him. Let’s be honest, true love isn’t all romantic date nights and grand gestures of affection; in reality, there’s a whole lot of legwork that goes into building a solid foundation outside of the honeymoon phase. Maybe he really loves football, so you start to appreciate watching games as your Sunday ritual even if it was never your thing in the past. Making the relationship work will require compromise from both of you, but when it’s true love, this doesn’t feel like a huge sacrifice.
5. You want to share things with him. When you’re truly in love, your partner becomes your best friend. You’ll find that you want to share details of your day with him, even if it’s just little tidbits of office drama, or something interesting you saw while taking a walk through your neighborhood.
6. You don’t expect perfection. You know that you aren’t perfect, and you would never expect your partner to be either; actually, when you’re truly in love, you’ll likely find that you love him for his little imperfections, not despite them. There is bound to be conflict in your relationship, but true love is all about working together to forge a happy life, regardless of what momentary turmoil may spring up.
7. You can be yourself around him. You always withhold some of your quirks when you meet someone new, but as you get closer, you’ll start to cut loose. If it’s true love, you’ll begin to feel more comfortable being your genuine self because you’ll feel accepted by him when you are; all of that fear that he’ll go running for the hills when he sees the real you will simply melt away.
You may be developing some of these feelings for a man without any assurances that he’s looking for the same sort of relationship you are; in that case, it’s never a bad idea to stay open to meeting new men so you don’t fall hard for someone who isn’t emotionally available.
Though the dating pool may feel limited during COVID-19, the safest way to meet someone at the moment is through online dating with video chats; if this method is a little foreign to you at the moment, check out my free guide, How to Make a Good First Impression Video Chat Dating.