How to Come Off as Confident (Even If You’re Not)

A 2011 survey about how confident managers feel in their profession found that half of the female respondents reported self-doubt about their job performance. On the other hand, fewer than a third of the male respondents said the same thing.

Despite the tremendous strides women have made, this lack of female confidence is increasingly well documented. Women generally underestimate their abilities, from taking tests to going for promotions. It often holds us back from getting what we want.

The reasons behind this “confidence gap” range from upbringing to biology. One contributing factor has to do with the fact that women are taught to be people-pleasers. Because of that, we are generally less confident than men so we are more vulnerable to pressure from other people. That makes it even harder for us when we get frequent societal messages that confidence is not OK.

Sure, “high maintenance” might mean demanding and needy, but we can just as easily be labeled that because we have high standards. And the term “bitch” is used when women act like men and are more ambitious or aggressive than someone thinks we should be. How dare we not be nice and quiet?

So if you lack confidence, you come by it honestly. But, it doesn’t have to hold you back. Acting confident when you’re not can lead you…